The nurse just called. It is day four of school, and there are already problems with who will be responsible for feeding my child. The truth is no one wants to carve time out of her busy schedule to do it, even though nobody would dare speak those words – definitely not to me. After calling my husband and discussing the problem/potential solutions, I immediately opened up the Bible app on my phone. I needed a word. No. I NEED a word. Present tense. Being a parent of a special needs child is HARD! Prayer carries me through. I knelt down, speechless. The Holy Spirit interceded for me (Romans 8:26). The devotional which appeared on the screen of my app rang true. “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)
The negativity rising in me dissipated. The drastic measures I wanted to take like jumping in the car and demanding an emergency ARD meeting, or calling my son’s classroom, or contacting every friend with special needs kids and bemoaning the injustices of life disappeared. My mind was blank. Seriously. Blank. That NEVER happens. In all my 32 years, I don’t think my mind has been blank once, until today.
I couldn’t think of anything good so, the Lord cleared my mind. Maybe He was insisting He has this. Possibly He wanted me to give thanks that my son attends school, before I stormed out the door, called the original ARD members who promised me it wouldn’t be a problem to feed him liars, and withdrew him without looking back. Perhaps He wanted me to stop thinking about what a complete waste of my time this is and how everything has to be so darn difficult for me. He wanted me to WAIT in SILENCE for his blessings to reveal themselves.
Romans 8:28 declares, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” In the matter of my son not getting the accommodations he was promised, I am already a victor, not a defeated opponent. With that knowledge, I don’t need clenched fists and attitude flaring. The gentle spirit God has already planted in me should reign (Galatians 5:22-23). I will document what is happening, so I can be prepared to advocate for my child, but GOD is the ultimate advocate for my son. He created him, and he has sustained him. He’s got his back, and the protector of all things is a much better bodyguard than wimpy ol’ me.